that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
