I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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