Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
