and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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