Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
well most of my day revolves around power hour
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
