i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
