champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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