Joe is yelling at the trees again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
