I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
