Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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