i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
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