We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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