can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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