careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
