girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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