did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
