just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize