Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
hell yes lets make some ravioli
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
