My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
