Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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