Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
