Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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