Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?

(1-440): View more from Ohio

because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?

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(302): View more from Delaware

remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block

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(423): View more from Tennessee

He played with my vagina like it was a turntable

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(205): View more from Alabama

im getting a BJ in a closet

(205): View more from Alabama

and a penguin just handed me a bong

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(757): View more from Virginia

He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.

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(740): View more from Ohio

He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.

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