I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
