The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
home. puking in laundry basket.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
