I'm lost and stupid without you.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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