Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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