i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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