I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
