he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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