hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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