google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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