I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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