1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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