It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Randomize
