A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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