well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
