With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
