if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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