Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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