So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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