What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
