I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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