Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
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He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
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We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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