Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
