dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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