I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
