it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize