thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize