I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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